OK, let me explain to you what a nice friend is, a nice friend is a person who is always there for you no matter what, a person who will always listen to your ramblings, and not even question why it is you haven't bothered to ask them " so, how are you!". A nice friend is there at the drop of a hat, which is fine, there is nothing wrong with that at all, as i am " the nice friend" ...but ( and yes there is a big huge, massive, BUT!!) be careful, as there are certain types of friends who take pleasure from feeding off of you ( they live for it, as they know, you are " the nice friend" who never says no!) let me break a few of these feeders down for you...
- The "Friend who isn't happy until your miserable" ...meaning that so called friend is only around when things are going bad for you, you know the type, they never called you 6months ago when you told them your engaged, but as soon as they find out your man cheated on you, its all " ahhh babes, he was a d**k head anyways, you want to go out tonight?!" yeah, because, that helps! low and behold you get back together, you will not hear from them for a good while! My advice, do not pick up the phone to them
- The " I know its a lot to ask, but can you" friend...now this type of friend only calls you when they need a favour, ie, money! bearing in mind they still haven't payed you back the last ten times you loaned them money ( sorry, more fool you) and they've just finished telling you about their two week stay in Barbados, how it was so cheap, blah blah blah! My advice is before they finish off the sentence, tell them, " sorry I don't have it" as one day you're going to need that cash back, and they will tell you, sorry I don't have it...
- The " it's all right i'll pay for you friend"...lets not even go there, all I am going to say is I was bought up not to rely on anyone false stop, if I don't have the cash to go anywhere then I'm not going nowhere! when someone tells me, " I'll pay for you" its goes in one ear and out the other ( i hold no grudges) because I know its not going to happen, hay what can I say, if it makes you feel good! lol! My advice, don't really listen to these people, it's pointless..
- The " you only hear from them when they don't have a man" friend! errrrhmmmmm ( yes i am clearing my throat for this one!) this really annoys me, this type of friend could've called you for the last two weeks twice a day! but as soon as the catch a man, you don't hear from them at all! it come like, there in the film " misery" so what, is your man locking you up in a cottage somewhere, I mean, are you playing the role of "James Caan" and your man playing the role of " Kathy Bates" is this the reason why, you can't get to the phone, keep breaking comitments?! in my eyes there is no excuse for this kind of behaviour, none..I can not understand people who do this? do you not value your friendships? and do you not think that its insulting, when you only call when you've broken up with you your other half, bearing in mind you were together for two years, oh you suddenly remember , moi! right then, OK. My advice is, you must know how they are by now, just get used to it...when they do finally call you, and are in shock that your now living in Spain, LOL!
A real friend will be there no matter what, they will not only call you when they need something, and they will not make empty promises,they will not exploit your kindness, some people are only meant to be in your life for a season, and some people you will have to let go..
Just be careful who you call a friend..
Keep on being " the nice friend" as you shouldn't make no one change your nature..
xx S
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